The latest writing from all your favorite Screengrab refugees
It’s been eight long years since Mel Gibson headlined a major motion picture, an eternity for any A-list actor. That Gibson has spent much of the interim in the tabloids makes his attempt at a comeback anything but sure, but the one-time lethal weapon has tried to stack the odds in his favor by hewing as closely to his established screen persona as possible.
by Leonard Pierce
Pop culture can be as forbidding as it is inviting, particularly in areas that invite geeky obsession: The more devotion a genre or series or subculture inspires, the easier it is for the uninitiated to feel like they’re on the outside looking in. But geeks aren’t born; they’re made. And sometimes it only takes the right starting point to bring newbies into various intimidatingly vast obsessions. Gateways To Geekery is our regular attempt to help those who want to be enthralled, but aren’t sure where to start. Want advice? Suggest future Gateways To Geekery topics by emailing gateways@theonion.com.
Geek obsession: Dub
by Scott Von Doviak
It seems like old times at the multiplex as Edge of Darkness (opening Friday) marks Mel Gibson’s return to the big screen in a starring role for the first time in eight years.
Not only that, but Mel is back to doing what he does best — or if not best, certainly most: seeking violent retribution (see also Mad Max, Payback, The Patriot, Ransom).
But there’s another reason Edge of Darkness may look more than a little familiar: It’s adapted from a six-part British miniseries of the same name that aired on the BBC in 1985 and is on DVD. Darkness is far from the only example of Hollywood reaching across the pond for inspiration: Last year’s State of Play was similarly inspired by a UK miniseries, and this year, Chris Rock will star in Death at a Funeral, Neil LaBute’s remake of a 2007 England-set comedy.
Liz Lent and Leonard Pierce stop in to discuss how one should decorate their space at work? Put a lot into it, or keep an emotional distance? Quickly Now! asks about everyone’s first professional sporting experience and we gain another sponsor who doesn’t know they’ve been gained.
After reading the left-progressive reactions on The Huffington Post to what I thought was a good if not perfect State of the Union speech by Obama last night (and after weeks/months of left-progressive and even Daily Show attacks on the Democrats), it’s more clear than ever that left-progressives have trouble winning because our true strength is complaining. Not pitching in, not supporting, but tearing down.
Continue reading ‘State of the Liberal Union: Bitch, Bitch, Bitch’
by Scott Von Doviak & Andrew Osborne
Scott Von Doviak: The fifth season of Lost ended with a literal bombshell, as the survivors of Oceanic Flight 815 trapped in the island’s past dropped an atomic warhead down the hatch in hopes of setting off an explosion that would prevent their plane from ever crashing, thus rebooting their personal histories. Meanwhile, back in the island’s present, we learned that ousted Others leader Ben really had killed his heir apparent John Locke, as an imposter posing as Locke engineered the murder of mythical island ruler Jacob.
If all of this sounds like complete gibberish, then you obviously aren’t one of the millions of viewers breathlessly awaiting the February 2nd premiere of the final season of the mind-bending series that has intrigued, infuriated, bewitched, bothered, and bewildered us (often all at the same time) for the past five years. Writer-producers Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse have many questions to answer in the climactic run of sixteen episodes. Among them: did the lostaways succeed at changing history? What is the smoke monster? Why does Richard Alpert never age? Why is Jack’s dead father still hanging around the island? And most importantly, where can we get our hands on a six-pack of that refreshing Dharma beer?
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by Hayden Childs
I’ve considered Gravity’s Rainbow to be among my favorite books since I spent a week reading it when I was 20. I remember how overwhelming the experience was: the absence of anything approaching a traditional plot structure with seemingly disjointed episodes leading further and further into confusion, the characters hilarious and exasperating and opaque, the sublime ridiculousness of the plot points, the extremity and vulgarity in the many, many sex scenes, but more than anything Pynchon’s ability to draw pure poetry and a near-gnostic wisdom from his cartoonish hyper-reality.
I’d been touched by great works of literature before, but this was the first great work of literature that fundamentally changed me. My entire way of seeing had been engulfed by Gravity’s Rainbow. An arc of history had me caught in its parabola. I wondered how to dislodge myself before the inevitable crashdown. I reveled in my small freedoms. I grew more paranoid.
Move over, Francis Ford Coppola: You no longer hold the record for overseeing the most tortured, laborious production of a Vietnam War film in motion picture history. That honor has been passed to Austin’s Paul Hanley, writer-director of the stop-motion animated epic Viva The ’Nam, which finally gets its regional debut with a Jan. 27 screening at the Alamo Drafthouse Downtown.
Borrowing not only Assault on Precinct 13‘s premise of strangers fending off attacking hordes while holed up in a building, but also its signature use of an ice cream truck as a vehicle for unholy evil, Legion has the good sense to mimic a classic but otherwise has no sense at all. Like The Book of Eli, Scott Stewart’s film pivots around the issue of true faith, interested as it is with an angel named Michael (Paul Bettany) who disobeys God’s orders to lead an apocalyptic military campaign against humanity by plummeting to Earth, severing his wings, and stocking up on artillery in the hopes of saving a baby destined to lead mankind to salvation. This child is in the womb of a waitress (Willa Holland) at an isolated truck stop diner in the Mojave Desert, where random folk (including Dennis Quaid, Tyrese Gibson, and Charles S. Dutton) converge just as an end-of-days swarms of flies and divinely possessed zombies begin to appear on the horizon.
Extraordinary Measures — Before I begin, I should mention that Nerve initially asked me to review all of this week’s new releases, but I told them I ALREADY WORK AROUND THE CLOCK!
Yes, Extraordinary Measures has a viral catchphrase that’s sweeping the nation, but that’s not necessarily good news for the movie’s marketing team, since the only reaction Harrison Ford’s indignant declaration could provoke is mocking laughter. That makes it a little harder to take seriously what is essentially the big-screen equivalent of an earnest Lifetime Network movie (albeit one with an expensive cast).
