The Exiled Year In Sexiness

by Andrew Osborne & Scott Von Doviak

So last week, Nerve posted the Year In Movie Sexiness, but it left a few of our write-ups Exiled — which, of course, is what this here blog is all about!

Sexiest Performance:  Male
Mark Ruffalo in The Kids Are All Right

How sexy is Mark Ruffalo (or “Ruffles” as my wife calls him)?  Sexy enough to inspire giggly pet names from happily married women, apparently — but Julianne Moore’s lesbian mom goes even further in The Kids Are All Right, risking her domestic partnership (to uptight Annette Bening) for some of the hottest, naked-est sperm donation of the year. (AO)

Sexiest Performance, Female
Mila Kunis, Black Swan

Were we really supposed to feel sorry for Natalie Portman’s psycho ballerina in Black Swan?  Sure, the white swan’s movie-long nervous breakdown is one of the all-time doozies, but let’s face it: if you absolutely had to have vivid, delusional sex fantasies about someone, it might as well be Mila Kunis.  It’s safe to say Kunis has shaken off her image as the girl from That ‘70s Show in a big way, despite the lack of an Oscar nomination for her role as Portman’s rival-turned-imaginary-bedmate.  In contrast to the porcelain, virginal Portman, Kunis is a sexually-charged force of nature, gimlet-eyed and predatory in a way we’ve not seen in her earlier sitcom and rom-com work.  Sure, she’s always been smokin’ hot, but here she proves scary can be sexy, too. (SVD)

Best Breakout in Sex Appeal (Male)
Tom Hardy, Inception

The films of Christopher Nolan have been showered with superlatives over the years, but it’s unlikely that anyone has ever described them as “sexy.”  Nolan tends to be more interested in mind-fucking than the more carnal variety, and that was never truer than in Inception, with its multiple dream-world narratives and head-spinning reams of exposition.  The one notable exception to the rule was Hardy’s smoldering presence as the forger Eames.  Here was a character whose role in the big scheme was a sort of seduction, based on his ability to lure the dream-team’s mark into a trusting state of mind, and in portraying him, Hardy seduced the audience right away from former dreamboat Leonardo DiCaprio.  Prior to Inception, Hardy had specialized in British brutes like “Handsome Bob” in Guy Ritchie’s RocknRolla and the title character in Bronson, but here he displays a wit and sophistication undreamed of in those roles. Let’s hope he continues to develop those qualities, lest he follow in the footsteps of last year’s Biggest Loss in Sex Appeal winner, Gerard Butler. (SVD)


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