Not Quite A Eulogy

by Andrew Osborne

Well, I know three things about Hugo Chavez.

1. He hated George W. Bush, so he wasn’t all bad.

2. I met a Venezuelan once who complained about him shutting down papers and/or jailing journalists or something like that, but when I asked if he was a scary dictator she rolled her eyes and said he was mostly just a pompous windbag.

3. He worked with Joe Kennedy to get cheap (Citgo) heating oil to low-income Massachusetts residents (when the U.S. government and U.S. oil companies couldn’t have given less of a shit). But because Chavez was a commie (or whatever) and criticized Bush, some conservative MA politician bleated that the famous Citgo sign overlooking Fenway Park should be changed to a big American flag. Fortunately, cooler heads prevailed.

So vaya con Dios, Hugo, whichever direction you’re heading in the afterlife.

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